I often get a letter, email, text, inbox, etc. on this subject.
Let me start off by giving you my own personal definition of a "mama's boy".
Mama's Boy: a man whose relationship with his mother clouds his judgement to have a romantic relationship with a woman. He seeks approval from his mother for every decision he makes. He's not able to truly form a bond with a spouse due to interference from said mother and he's unable to "man up" and separate "his mother" and "his woman".
Earlier last year, The Go2Gurl and I did a show on "mama's boys" and we were thrown off when an actual "mama's boy" called in and we got to hear him completely disrespect his woman LIVE on air (The Go2Gurl wasn't having that...check out the show). We definitely weren't expecting it but we all know that they exist. I personally am very close to my parents. They both mean the world to me; however, I do understand the difference between my parent(s) and my man! There are just some things that my parents can't do for me that my man can (ya feel me?).
I recently received a dear iCandi letter from a young lady in California and I decided to use her letter to survey my Facebook Candi Babies. First, I took her scenario to the men.
"Okay Fellas: your mother and your wife get into a very heated argument over something pertaining to your children. Your mother calls your wife a b*tch and your wife tells your mom to leave the house. How do you diffuse the situation?"
I honestly thought my Facebook fellas were going to give some great advice. They understand that once a man is married he and his wife have a certain bond and commitment that NO ONE is to come between. Most of the men that responded agreed and they gave some very intelligent and respectable answers.
Mom's has got to go...and we will resolve the situation at another time...Cant have her calling my wife a b*tch...Totally disrespectful and even worse if it is done in front of the children." ~Brent~
"First of all that is completely rubbish or nonsense and I will not let my own mother get away with because once everybody see that and now gives some older people the access to disrespect my wife. I will ask my mother 2 questions and the questions will be "Do you love me" and "do you want me to be happy?" Then I will ask her to apologize to my wife and I will also apologize to my wife with loving tears and then I will kiss my mother and tell her how much I truly appreciate her as my mother and then I will kiss my wife in front of my mother." ~Ubong~
"I would support my wife. I would walk my mother to her car and explain to her what she already knows; which is, she can't disrespect my wife like that. I would then make sure my wife and kids are okay. Hopefully we can sit down and work it out like adults at a later time." ~Donald~
one answer really surprised me
"First of all mom is NOT leaving the house, second of all mom raised me so wifey will have to take this one and chalk it up. If MY mom called my wife a bitch I am certain there was a reason so like adults we will sit down and talk about it and figure out if an apology needs to be in order." ~A True Mama’s Boy~
I’m not sure about you all (as in my readers) but this guy has the game ALL MESSED UP!!! Nowhere is he at all coming to his WIFE’S defense. This is the woman he married and committed the rest of his life to. He wants his wife to “chalk it up” and if his mother called her a B*TCH “she must have had a reason." Can we please put this clown in the HOT MESS OF A MONTH category? He definitely needs to have several seats and get his life (in my Tamar Braxton voice)!!